Thursday, 9 August 2018

The case of the gormless giant garden gnome grappler


'The case of the gormless giant garden gnome grappler' is a book title that Agatha Christie probably would have rejected on the grounds that it just featured too much alliteration, or contained a crime that was too unbelievable.

But this is no work of fiction, it's a very real case, and local in fact.

If you missed this story originally, a couple from Weekley Glebe Road in Kettering had their two-foot tall garden ornament stolen, but the hapless thief was pictured on CCTV, manhandling the oversize gnome before careering headfirst through a fence, like he was auditioning for You've Been Framed.

Sadly, the gnome was later found smashed to pieces, whether as a deliberate act of trying to conceal evidence or just another example of the miscreant being unable to stay upright whilst carrying such a large item of decorative garden fixture, who knows?

The footage has been seen by millions worldwide after it went viral on social media, and was even featured on news sites around the globe.

I have to say, I preferred it when Kettering was known for Wicksteed Park and being the home town of comedian James Acaster and the band Temples, but at least there is now a footnote to this story with a happier ending, as reported in the Northants Telegraph.

Northamptonshire Police officers very kindly bought the elderly couple two replacement giant gnomes, which they did in their spare time lest anyone churlishly accuse them of misuse of police time.

What a lovely gesture, and one that the couple are said to be 'chuffed' with.  It goes part way to restoring your faith in human nature, doesn't it?

The garden gnome grappler is still at large however, but let's hope he has learned his lesson and leaves these and any other outsize neighbourhood ornaments, well enough alone.

It may have been a joke gone wrong, or a drunken prank, but these incidents can be very unsettling for those to whom they happen. 

An apology would be good, gnome grappler!

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